Today is Dec. 10th.  Would have been 18 years married to Rob.  The other night he told Kaitlyn he met a lady going through the same thing he is going through.  He says he has only talked to her.  He also said if I would just say I wanted him back......
My first reaction was one of mixed feelings.  I don't want a relationship with him again, it would never work and just be exactly like it was; I don't want him to have a relationship first....
Then I stopped and thought about it.
I really want him to find his own true happiness.  Whatever that is.  If it means finding someone else, maybe someone he will never call names, or dislike, I want that for him.  The sooner the better.  Also, I want him to move on and get over me.  I know "we" can never be again.  To think of him happy and smiling is all I want for him.
There are so many mixed feelings going through this separation;  why it didn't work, how many years were put into it; how it has affected our kids; where do I go from here.... what lies ahead?
I will get divorced when the year is up; I will find my own "true happiness" for the rest of the years I have on the earth!  Life is too short to be anything but happy!
Oh the challenges this life holds for each of us......
We are made so much stronger through each trial.......